Your Midlife Crisis

Enjoy your Midlife Crisis

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No website dealing with midlife bachelorhood could possibly be complete without a discussion concerning the age-old topic of a “midlife crisis”, right? Well don’t worry – I won’t drone on forever about it, but I think it is important to talk about, as such a crisis can often be a contributor to many of the actions and behaviors we midlife bachelors undertake … whether we recognize it as a midlife crisis issue, or not.

What is a “midlife crisis”? Well – you can get different definitions from various sources … but in my mind it means that at some point (usually between the ages of 35 and maybe 50), you stop and ask yourself if you are missing out on something in life … and then you act upon that idea. I know – what I just said is very general … and that’s because I’ve seen so many different manifestations of a midlife crisis in people I know, and in myself. The classic midlife crisis is the mid-forties guy who has an affair with the mid-twenties secretary – only to be discovered by his wife, and then kicked out. In a case like that, the “crisis” was that the guy might have been bored with his wife … who is probably close to his own age … and then he wonders if he’ll ever get the opportunity again to fool around with a much younger woman … and so he proceeds to do so, and finds that he really likes it. Of course, the implications of having a midlife crisis of that nature are huge and far-reaching – it can devastate an entire family … and it happens all the time in today’s society.

Other forms of a midlife crisis are less devastating, but more obvious. For example, several middle-age guys that live in my neighborhood recently bought brand-new Corvettes. These guys are in their early fifties – so they are a little past the general age profile I called out earlier … but these cars are indeed midlife crisis cars! [One guy was married for years prior – his wife cheated on him, he kicked her out … then he bought the Corvette. The other guy was driving very boring vehicles for many years – and all of a sudden, he saw the other neighbor’s new Corvette and decided that he also needed one.] Don’t get me wrong – I love Corvettes … but suddenly purchasing an expensive sports car can be one very obvious sign of a midlife crisis! Hell – I’m no exception … I bought a brand-new BMW M3 just a few years ago. And I was the first to admit that the M3 was my “midlife crisis car”.

There are many forms of midlife crisis other than secret affairs and expensive sports cars – it really depends on the individual. It could be a job-related crisis – seeking out a new job or career after realizing that you have been too complacent for too long. It could be related to having children – one of my long-time friends, Brian, has been married twice, but never had any children. He made it his explicit goal to find a woman to marry who wants to have children immediately … and he wound up meeting her on-line. [He recently got married – so we’ll see if his goal is realized.] My other friend, Mike (who I’ve written a lot about) … the guy who could never get a date to save his life … he suddenly decided months ago that he absolutely had to get married and have children immediately … so he visited some website that specializes in introducing American men to women in the Philippines, and guess what? He is now engaged to be married to woman from over there. It is easy for us to criticize Mike for having to go to the third world to find someone who will actually want to stay with him – but the flip side to the criticism is at least he did what was necessary to achieve his goal! And I admire him for that!

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