Midlife Discussion Forums http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/ midlife discussion forums on midlife dating, midlife crisis, midlife health, finance en Thu, 17 May 2012 11:54:33 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/digitalvb/mlb/misc/rss.png Midlife Discussion Forums http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/ WHAT did i say now? http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1552-WHAT-did-i-say-now?goto=newpost Wed, 16 May 2012 03:57:50 GMT Its only Tuesday, I survived mothers day, yet seemed to be ticki g people off right and left, unwittingly. I can't wait to see what the rest of the week brings!

However, some insight....
1. YES I.am midlife, like you, but I dont care to discuss hormonal flux with you in the hall at work. especially since we have open Floor plan!!

2. Dont take it personal if I dont know you are having a hot flash kind of morning. Get away from Your desk at lunch. Take a walk. Work out in the evening. Manage it!!

3. Dont hate me because i dont count points for every freaking food i put in my mouth yet am slender. I work out!!

4. If your are you are going to text me at work about what underwear you saw me in last, dont take it personal if i am too busy to flirt.

5. If we're dating and you are needing something of me, then tell me, rather than say nothing when i think we had a good time, and then drop hints later. I can't read your mind.

6. If your goop falls out of the fridge at work and i have to clean yogurt AND dressing off the floor 2 days in a row as soon As i arrive at work, its nothin personal if i leave a note on the fridge asking peeps to please put containers back on The shelf. I did not get the memo from management about no post its on the office fridge!!

7. If you transfer from the competitor's to my jiu jitsu school i proooobably dont want a lesson from you. Nor do i want you to hit on me. Besides my stamina surpasses yours so I'll wait patiently for you to gas out and then hmmm put you to sleep with one of the chokes I've been practicing. Count on it.

Geez. :-D ]]> Midlife Forum A OK http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1552-WHAT-did-i-say-now Some Tips For Newly Single Guys http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1550-Some-Tips-For-Newly-Single-Guys?goto=newpost Tue, 15 May 2012 16:24:59 GMT So glad hes back.....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wASPTV5itlk So glad hes back.....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wASPTV5itlk ]]> Midlife Forum SamtheDog http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1550-Some-Tips-For-Newly-Single-Guys No more mystery left anymore, thanks to Facebook. http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1549-No-more-mystery-left-anymore-thanks-to-Facebook?goto=newpost Tue, 15 May 2012 00:19:03 GMT I hate Facebook. It has ruined my life. My longstanding fantasy about the boyfriend I had as a teenager has been shattered. There's no mystery or wonder left for me in the world anymore. I'm now bored ... and deflated. Might as well just fling myself off the CN Tower now and get it over with.

Okay, so divine justice does prevail. When I dated the boy-next-door (yes, he really did live on my street) he was the cutest guy ever. He was always in the park playing baseball or on the track running. Hot, hot, hot body ... handsome face ... he was such a great-looking guy and oh so very proud of his physique.

He also had a thing for skinny girls. That's why he liked me. I've always been thin. But he wanted me to be even thinner. I was a perfect anorexic in the making. Being young and silly and in love, of course, I starved myself. If I ate one hard-boiled egg, I felt like I had pigged out. The thinner I became, the prouder he became. "Look, I can put my hands around your waist and touch my fingers!" My mother thought I was pregnant because I even stopped having periods. That's how stupid I was as a young girl influenced by magazines and Twiggy and this first boyfriend.

So our family moves to another city, and we eventually break up, even though we have been trying to maintain a long-distance relationship. I pine over him for months, still wanting him to be my boyfriend. I start hearing about him through the grapevine that he's now dating a popular cheerleader girl who used to always turn her nose up at me. I am devastated. I hate both of them, those ... those ...beautiful people! LOL

Fast forward to present times. I'm reading about the of death Davy Jones and come across this link for some kind of a Monkees fan site. Members' names are listed randomly here and there, and I see one name that stops me dead in my tracks. I think, "Nah, it couldn't be," but he always was an avid fan of the Monkees, so I know the odds are pretty good that it's him.

Naturally, I click on his name and it leads me to his Facebook page, which is totally viewable by the public at large. Photos, friends, wall posts - you name it - all there to satisfy my burning curiousity.

Well, let me tell you ... I could hardly recognize him. Fat much? OMG, his numerous chins were practically touching his chest. That hunky body he used to have? Now it looked like all he had done for the past 30 years was scarf down as many double deep-fried, soaked-in-butter Twinkies with a side of greasy fat as he could. He was NOT an attractive man.

Now,if you think I'm being quite the b!tch here, you are absolutely correct! LOL Seeing him like that made me feel good! I admit it. I'm a horrible person. But, man, after being told again and again to watch my weight and his absolute repugnance and intolerance for anyone daring to be a quarter of an ounce overweight ... yeah, that was divine justice, all right.

So now that my predisposed stalker tendencies were already unleashed, I thought I might as well take a look at all of his friends while I was at it. I mean, most of them were people I knew too, including "mean girl." Well, she was no longer a cheerleader on the playing field - she WAS the playing field. Delighted, I moved on to the next, and the next, and the next...

After gorging myself with so much information on everybody (people of my generation aren't too bright about their privacy on the Internet, apparently), I suddenly thought, "Oh no! What have I done?"

I killed the mystery. I now know too much. Thanks, Facebook. ]]> Midlife Forum Karine http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1549-No-more-mystery-left-anymore-thanks-to-Facebook Miss Ticking Clock http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1548-Miss-Ticking-Clock?goto=newpost Mon, 14 May 2012 13:48:15 GMT http://blog.vh1.com/2012-04-15/tough-love-new-orleans-episode-1-the-vergina-whisperer/ I really enjoy watching the trash tv series Tough Love on... http://blog.vh1.com/2012-04-15/tough...ina-whisperer/

I really enjoy watching the trash tv series Tough Love on vh1. I especially like the way the host Steve doesn't mince words with the clueless women and calls them on their bs.

On the newest season they have a 40 year old contestant, Miss Ticking Clock.

For me or probably any guy who has been on a lot of dates all of the contestants seem very, very familiar. ]]> Midlife Forum kjmudd http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1548-Miss-Ticking-Clock Rule Three for Online Dating http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1547-Rule-Three-for-Online-Dating?goto=newpost Mon, 14 May 2012 01:05:34 GMT The first time I talk to a woman on the phone, the bulk of the conversation should not concern how her ex sucks. *Yesh* I could not get off the... The first time I talk to a woman on the phone, the bulk of the conversation should not concern how her ex sucks. *Yesh* I could not get off the phone fast enough.

-EZ ]]> Midlife Forum EverythingZen http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1547-Rule-Three-for-Online-Dating <![CDATA[Happy Mommy's day to all the single mom batchelorettes out there.]]> http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1546-Happy-Mommy-s-day-to-all-the-single-mom-batchelorettes-out-there?goto=newpost Sun, 13 May 2012 12:53:34 GMT Happy Mommy's day. As a divorced dad I truly appreciate all the work, sacrifice, and struggle you ladies go through each day. So I hope you all have a wonderful day today.

-EZ ]]> Midlife Forum EverythingZen http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1546-Happy-Mommy-s-day-to-all-the-single-mom-batchelorettes-out-there Babysitter http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1545-Babysitter?goto=newpost Sun, 13 May 2012 00:48:52 GMT I got to ask - wife left me and about a month later I slept with the Babbysitter, just a fling for a month. Actually unsure who seduced who. It ended... I got to ask - wife left me and about a month later I slept with the Babbysitter, just a fling for a month. Actually unsure who seduced who. It ended abrubtly and seemed to end on its own, she still helps with the kids and we text a bit during the week but I always wondered was it an attraction to me or was it "be with an older guy" thing. She has known me a while and it seemed like once the oppurtunity was there she took it (idk). Also, whats all your advice on dating someone 20 years younger.
She has a boyfriend but I cant see it lasting, she seems a little more ambitious - he is also 10+ older than her.
I feel like there is something between us, just not sure what LOL becasue I am pretty messed up right now.

Is this a normal thing? Sympathy for the dad etc.

No regreats it was awesome, its just I never expected it and so soon after my wife left ]]> Midlife Forum trice412 http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1545-Babysitter Spring in Indy (Vehicular eye candy) http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1544-Spring-in-Indy-(Vehicular-eye-candy)?goto=newpost Sat, 12 May 2012 22:25:58 GMT I posted this a couple days ago and had to be pulled by Gregory due to my bad. Sorry Greg. For any of you who are interested, enjoy. In a couple... I posted this a couple days ago and had to be pulled by Gregory due to my bad. Sorry Greg.

For any of you who are interested, enjoy. In a couple of weeks this years pace cars will be out.

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]]> Midlife Forum Vienna http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1544-Spring-in-Indy-(Vehicular-eye-candy) A different book--50 Shades of Grey http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1543-A-different-book-50-Shades-of-Grey?goto=newpost Sat, 12 May 2012 14:55:34 GMT No, not The Game this time. Something very different!
Any women here reading it? and maybe leaving it out where your bf might "accidently" pick it up? ]]> Midlife Forum Isabelle http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1543-A-different-book-50-Shades-of-Grey Last Night http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1541-Last-Night?goto=newpost Fri, 11 May 2012 22:57:32 GMT Last night in San Francisco. Arrived Monday and hooked up with a real hotty I'd been flirting with on Facebook. Went out Monday and expected a nice dinner and a peck on the check good night all on the company nickel. Now it's Friday and its been an emotionally intense week, hawt and very intense :cool: We're going out again tonight and I think I may pack this woman up and take her back to Dallas. :eek: Sucks cause the bar has been raised for the Dallas audition list. ]]> Midlife Forum WhyZeeGuy http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1541-Last-Night Glasses http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1540-Glasses?goto=newpost Fri, 11 May 2012 20:28:11 GMT Ok, so at age 53 I am finally going to the optometrist for glasses. I haven't had my eyes checked by a Doc since grade school as my vision has always been 20/15 but I need help reading now. Probably get 2 pairs, what should I look for in frames? ]]> Midlife Forum Longboarder http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1540-Glasses ) observation about online dating, women contacting you, and the time of the month http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1539-)-observation-about-online-dating-women-contacting-you-and-the-time-of-the-month?goto=newpost Fri, 11 May 2012 02:45:42 GMT OK, I've been a member of an online dating site for three months now and I'm starting to notice a trend. At the begining of the month women are much more likely to email, wink, or otherwise reach out to a man than the rest of the month. The number of unsolicited initial contacts I get from women in the first week runs about 3 times higher than the remainder of the month.

Any thoughts, observations, insights. Is it just that there is a steady stream of women saying "OK this month I am finally going to do something about meeting a man"?

-EZ ]]> Midlife Forum EverythingZen http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1539-)-observation-about-online-dating-women-contacting-you-and-the-time-of-the-month New to this world http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1538-New-to-this-world?goto=newpost Thu, 10 May 2012 14:59:48 GMT So, like many of you, this is total foreign territory to me. Early 40's, two kids (11 &7) a little over a year out from loss of spouse. Dated this past year, (actually was engaged to a great woman in her mid 30's) Single mom, but too many things just didn't work out. Wish it did.

Anyways, 6 day /week busy work schedule, no ex spouse to help with kids, and NO experience out in the field (Married high school sweetheart) A little nervous, and to top it all off, I'm shy. The only reason i think I even met this other woman was because she reached out to me.

What the hell do I do?? Bars? Friends? Don't know this routine at all. Don't even know how to break the ice. Small town, and it SEEMS like all the good women are taken.

I KNOW I will get some suggestions. :confused: ]]> Midlife Forum futureisbright http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1538-New-to-this-world I guess there are no fourth chances, huh? http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1537-I-guess-there-are-no-fourth-chances-huh?goto=newpost Sun, 06 May 2012 18:06:17 GMT Before I met the love of my life, there was only one other man that I can say I was truly in love with after my marriage ended. But I broke up with... Before I met the love of my life, there was only one other man that I can say I was truly in love with after my marriage ended. But I broke up with him due to a series of events that turned my life upside down and that I thought would cause us to break up eventually... although I can see now that we probably could have weathered these things. Ah, good old hindsight.

Over the years, he popped back into my life exactly three times. And, of course, each time we had sex. I'll bet you can see where this is going, can't you?

Each time we had one of these encounters, I would get all hopeful again that we could work things out and pick up where we left off. And each time, I would get hurt again because he wouldn't call or he would act vague and disappear. I would get all upset and say to myself, "Never again." Yeah, okay.

The last time he contacted me was on a dating site. (Coincidentally, we were both on the same one.) We had some flirty banter, and then one day he sent me an email with the subject: "Your way tonight." He lives a fair distance away, so I knew the only reason he was going to be in my neck of the woods is because he was probably meeting someone from that same dating site. He also persisted with a series of emails telling me how much he was still attracted to me, like a "moth to a flame," he said. He added that he would always be there for me, that I would always hold a special place in his heart, and he always signed off with "xoxo."

I almost waivered, but didn't give in. I succinctly replied honestly that I could never be a FWB with him and that I still had feelings for him which got stirred up each time we met. I never got a reply. (Helloooo, what part about that clear message didn't I understand?)

Long story short, some time after my beloved died, don't ask me why, but I contacted this ex by email. I'll refer to him as "Flyboy" (he flies small planes). Flyboy had also lost someone very dear to him a few years earlier, so I knew he would understand how I felt. And if I'm honest with myself, maybe I was also trying to feel him out to see if perhaps he still had feelings for me. Losing someone to death makes people do crazy things... I was all mixed up emotionally. I was (and still am) very much grieving, but I was also afraid to be alone. I was lonely and scared, and for some reason, Flyboy represented emotional safety and security. Yeah, I know, I know ("How stupid IS this woman, anyway?")

His response to my email offered the usual condolences and advice about allowing myself to grieve. After a few emails back and forth, he told me how he had survived the grieving process by taking a trip to Cuba where he met an "angel" who taught him that life was still worth living, a 20-something Russian girl, and he sent me pictures of him and her together. In case you were wondering, he was probably about 59 at the time. I was a bit shocked by the pictures because I really didn't need to see this gorgeous young girl with him. I mean, really?

Sending me those pictures could only mean one thing, right? He was making a point of showing me that he was WAY over me. Now, this girl didn't become his Russian bride or anything, but it was a clear indication of what he could still attract at his age, I guess. Or maybe he meant for it to be taken as a sign of hope for me that life really can be enjoyed again despite this type of loss.

Yet he also says that he gets down and lonely at times, so that makes me wonder whether or not he has anybody in his life at the moment. Further, a mutual friend of ours whom I haven't seen or heard from in years (but he is still very close to) contacted me on a business networking site the other day. And this guy is not active on that site at all. Is that just a coincidence, or did Flyboy mention me to him? Who knows?

By becoming his FWB, I guess I wrecked any chance of him wanting a relationship with me. I'm thinking his respect for me went down a notch or two because I kept falling for it each time. Why should he want a relationship with someone he can call up and boink any time? Well, that will never happen again, but if I had a fourth chance to meet with him, and we did not have sex, I wonder if our relationship could pick up again. Or maybe it's just too late. Or maybe he's really just a jerk and I should forget about him completely.

Your thoughts, aside from "What kind of a flake are you, sister?" would be much appreciated. Thanks!

Karine ]]> Midlife Forum Karine http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1537-I-guess-there-are-no-fourth-chances-huh How to get boys to like you http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1536-How-to-get-boys-to-like-you?goto=newpost Sun, 06 May 2012 02:27:15 GMT ]]> Midlife Forum Vienna http://www.midlifebachelor.com/forums/showthread.php/1536-How-to-get-boys-to-like-you