Not taking things too personally is also true AFTER you have started dating a woman during your midlife bachelorhood. Minimizing critical female feedback might be difficult for you - as perhaps from being married for a long period of time prior, you could be sick of having your mate continuously tear you down piece by piece. Maybe for years during your marriage, your ex-wife told you that you are a fat, balding, insensitive bastard. Or maybe your ex-wife used to tell you that are an asshole, and that you never listen to anyone except yourself. [I may have even been told some of these things myself - hmmmm.] Anyway - the point is that women often say a lot of things that are not exactly productive in a relationship, and my suggestion to all midlife bachelors is that you never take harsh words or criticisms too personally ... especially when they are said during a heated argument.
Perhaps the greatest thing about being a midlife bachelor is that you are not married! This means that the significance of anything that is said to you is all up to your own interpretation. If you don't think it is valid, then ignore it. If it upsets you, you can either ask the woman to leave or simply not speak with her anymore. [You can also yell at her - but that usually doesn't help things.] My position on criticism is this - feedback is welcome, criticism is unwelcome. What is the difference between "feedback" and "criticism"? Feedback is constructive and positive, whereas criticism is negative and counterproductive. I would consider being told that I shouldn't eat pizza because I am a fat bastard as an example of negative criticism. I would respond more favorably to being told something like, "Let's eat healthy for the next several weeks and maybe go to the gym" as an example of positive feedback.
NEXT is the second page of Fundamental Truth #2 - Don't Take Things Too Personally which goes into False Starts and Energy Conservation which you can also access through the DROPDOWN menu on the top-left of this page. You can also ADD ANY COMMENTS you wish down below (using our commenting system) OR you might even consider checking out our Midlife Dating Discussion Forum (link immediately below) ...
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