Midlife Bachelor

March 1, 2013
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  1. Choose and use photos strategically to convey or reinforce your messages or core themes.  Recognize that the photos you post on your online dating profile are just as much of a statement or message as what you write - so choose your photos carefully.  For example, if you are extremely good-looking - you probably do NOT want to write that in your profile, but it should be obvious in the photos you use.

  2. Have more than one photo - ideally three or four photos.  You want these photos to show the viewer what you look like - so that there are no surprises.  At least one headshot is good, along with a full body photo.

  3. Use recent photos.  All of those photos you post should be recent - no more than one year old.  They need to represent what you look like today - otherwise, they are a deception.  The truth is good karma - remember that!

  4. Smile.  Smiling is a universal symbol of warmth ... which is a great thing to convey in online dating photos.
Want more ideas on which photos to use or not to use?  Check out the article here called, Which Photos to Pick for Your Online Dating Profile ... which will give you both my perspective and one of my female author-friends' perspectives.

Many online dating sites ask you to write a separate paragraph or section where you describe the type of person you are seeking.  This is a great opportunity for you to narrow your audience toward those who have the attributes or characteristics you really want - and you are typically better off doing so in such a way as to preserve or even enhance the overall warmth of your message.  Keep the following ideals in mind when you are writing about the type of person you are looking for:

  1. Be realistic.  As mentioned previously, you need to be realistic in terms of what you are looking for.  This can mean different things to different people – and so I rely on your own sense of judgment to understand what I'm saying here.  If you find yourself failing, then you should consider relaxing your standards until you start to draw someone in the direction of what you consider ideal.

  2. Be positive.  Nothing is more unattractive than negativity - so keep that in mind.  Everything you write about who you seek should be positive in nature.

  3. Be specific, but not exclusionary.  As mentioned previously, you should avoid exclusionary terms - and instead use terms that characterize the type of person you really want.  Know that the more specific you become, the smaller the number of potential respondents ... so don't be overly narrow.  Sometimes you have to experiment with the specifics of what you are looking for - you may have to adjust your standards in order to bring a set of responses that you can then choose from.  A lot can depend on the dating site you are using, too – as some dating sites tend to attract more educated people versus others who focus more on photos.

  4. Convey a sense of warmth.  If you have learned anything from this article, it should be that you need to sound warm and inviting in order to have the best chance of attracting someone - and this is true throughout your online dating profile.

While you may not be able to use every single one of these suggestions - if you can incorporate even a handful of them into your dating profile, you'll be much better off than your online dating competition.  If you find yourself not getting many responses, then you need to fine-tune your profile ... go over it from top to bottom, and see what could be turning people away.  Often times, it is easier to relax your standards or language a little, and then weed out people who contact you based on what you see on their profile.  It also helps to have a trusted friend of the opposite sex go over your profile with you - and see what he or she thinks.   Just give it all a try, and then re-evaluate your profile, your messaging, and your tactics every month or so.  No one is perfect right out of the starting gate!

WANT TO MEET A WEALTHY MAN OR WOMAN ONLINE?  Check our article here on midlifebachelor.com entitled, How to Meet a Wealthy Man or Woman on Millionairematch. You don't have to be rich or wealthy yourself in order to meet someone like that - as the article explains.

Please feel free to comment on this article below, or to discuss this on our Midlife Forum

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