Midlife Bachelor

Updated January 1, 2013
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  1. Don't Send a Woman Flowers Just for the hell of it - she must EARN those flowers.  I have taken some heat from several of my female friends over this point-of-view but for me it just makes the most sense.   The woman must be contributing something to you and the relationship for you to send her flowers ... as one-way relationships are bad for the "giver".  Don't be that one-way "giver" ... best instead to give AND receive ... and in that case it is fine to send her flowers just because you love her.  If you send flowers too often then it can marginalize their effect.
  1. Never send flowers if SHE has misbehaved - you don't ever want to reward bad behavior.  I cannot emphasize this point enough.  If she is being bad ... like cheating ... or doing anything destructive to the relationship ... then do not reward that bad behavior with flowers or jewelry or anything ... because it sends the wrong message, and will ultimately make you feel bad about yourself.  Better to save that money!

Okay - so everything you just read was MY point-of-view.  I took the liberty of asking several of my female friends for their input on this, and I'll now pass an abbreviated version of what they said along to you ... just so you have several different data points.  Remember - all women are different.  These women were first given my lists above so there are some intersections ... plus some of what they told me has been incorporated above.  OH - and if it comes down to choosing what they say below versus what I say above, then you should listen to me first ;o)  ha ha

What Several Female Friends of Mine Say about Sending Flowers


  1. Flowers at her work to showoff are the best - makes her feel like the luckiest woman in the world
  2. Always use a florist - don't hand pick flowers, nor use store-bought ones
  3. Flowers don't make up for you doing something bad but some do women milk it
  4. Morning after first sex is a great idea
  5. Day after a date when you don't want to see them anymore.  [I pretty much disagree with this one - as I'd say this is throwing good money away after something bad.]
  6. After a breakup if caused by a move or similar
  7. Just for the hell of it / thinking of you are the best is great
  8. Would rather have a plant to grow


  1. Prefers being sent or given flowers when no strings are attached
  2. Just thinking about her is great
  3. No roses - spring flowers or tulips
  4. Likes if he self-arranges (this is opposite of most women, I believe)
  5. Flowers don't make the man (fully agree here)


  1. Not a flowers kind of girl - prefers words ... a card or nice note
  2. If she works in an office you MUST send them on birthday and Valentine's Day
  3. Spontaneous is best - assuming the woman likes/appreciates flowers
  4. After first time sex - that is hot
Beth: I disagree with your comment about not sending flowers for the heck of it ... that's the best time to get flowers ... when you least expect it!  Also, it's nice to get flowers when you have a stressful day/week coming up with work ... and NEVER, EVER, NEVER send carnations ... yuck ... reminds me of funerals!  Gerbera daisies are my faves!

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