The Midlife Bachelor Personal Makeover >> Personal Appearance Rev 2.0 – Look the Part >> Fat and Happy

Fat and Happy?  What about Weight?
Everything I have talked about here thus far concerning appearance has focused on a lot of micro-level physical details … teeth, hair, clothes, shoes, jewelry, etc.   What if you have taken care of all of those things – but you weigh 350 pounds?   Or you look fairly normal – but you have a big beer belly which makes you look eight months pregnant?  I’m not going to lie to you – you will have to do something about it.   You will need to change your diet, and you will need to get your fat lazy slug ass over to the gym, or join one of those diet clubs, etc. – because that weight will not go away on its own.   Surgery might even be an option if you are really obese.    What I can tell you is that whatever your weight – you need to look your best, and you need to feel good about yourself so that you have confidence in your own appearance.    If you lack self-confidence (due to your weight or otherwise), you might as well be wearing a big sign around your neck that says PATHETIC … because that is the image you are likely to exude.   You, my midlife brother, need to be able to walk tall and be proud of who you are, and what you look like … so if you are embarrassed because of your weight, then take the necessary steps RIGHT NOW in order to get it under control.

What did I mean above by “fat and happy”?  I meant that you can be overweight AND happy with yourself.    And if this is the case with you, then you may not need to lose much or any weight … as long as you love who you are, and how you look!    Let me give you an example.   One of my good friends, also named Greg, has always been slightly overweight … he has always weighed roughly twenty pounds more than me.    Greg is always a very happy guy – if he was a dog, he’s be a Jack Russell Terrier because he is so full of life, and so happy all the time.   Anytime his weight would come up, Greg would always say something extremely positive about it – as though his weight was PERFECT.    When we would go jet skiing, I’d have to zip up the back of his wetsuit – and in front of everyone, I would say “BREATH IN NOW” … he’d then suck in his gut, then I would zip up the suit, …and then he’d let his belly puff out again.   He’d then slap his belly, and do a twirl for everyone and say something like, “I am looking sexy in this wetsuit!” – which was WAY TOO TIGHT, and fairly unflattering.   But Greg always took it in stride.   As we got older, and our waistlines started to move outward – Greg would hear me say stuff like, “Man, these jeans are getting tight – I need to get my lazy slug ass to the gym.”, and he would respond with something like,

       “If those pants are too tight, don’t go to the gym – just buy
bigger clothes.  If the 34s are too tight, I bet you’d look
great in 36s!”

And he’d always say this with a huge grin.   The guy has the best attitude of anyone I’ve ever met in my life – not just concerning weight, but overall.   The bottom line here is – if you are happy with the way you look, then don’t necessarily change it … but if you are unhappy with it, then you must start doing something about it immediately.

Avatar of Greg Smith
About the Author

Midlife Bachelor chronicles lifestyle, dating, and relationship experiences and advice to avoid a midlife crisis. Readers like you are often beyond young adulthood in their 30’s, 40’s, and 50’s that want to understand how dating, sex, relationships, and love fit in with our lifestyles.